Friday, July 18, 2014

Loss, Love and New Life (with updated pics)

Every time I sit down to write in my blog I think that there will never be more to report about than there is this time, but each time I am proven wrong!  I always think my plate can't get any fuller....I am always wrong!  What I know for sure is that while there are set backs and accomplishments, tragedies and blessings, God is the author of life and He always has a plan that is more full and bigger than I am ever able to imagine or dream up.

Before I go any further I want to share some pictures that I just received. My agency sent them to me even though they are not of Liliana specifically she is in the background. They were taking pictures of these beautiful baby girls to send to their newly matched adoptive families and they noticed Lily was in the background and wanted to send me some updated pics.  I can't get over how skinny her little legs are, though - Gabby's are at least 3 times that size and they are the same age! I just want to get her home and plumped up :)

 Lily is in the background here in the over sized white shirt looking right at the camera (the only child who seems to be interested in whatever is going on with those babies!! haha :)  I can see that she doesn't miss a thing and seems very quietly aware of what is going on around her.  Love her so much :)

In this one she is almost smiling at whoever is standing up and getting the babies attention for the pictures. I love that she is alert and seems to enjoy attention...such a wonderful thing to see in any orphaned child :) On another note - how precious are these babies??!!  I could just scoop them all up! So happy for them and their families that will be together soon  :)

So after having said all that,  It makes me excited to wake up each day just knowing that I am not in control (thank the Lord!) and that God will have amazing things in store for my life every day if I will follow where He tells me to go.

One example of that is the path he recently directed us down for childcare that we had been looking to fill.  While I know that we are meant to have ALL these children I also know that I need a little help in with their care in order to stay sane and be the best mother I can be - at least while the girls are so young. :)  We really explored hiring a more full time nanny to really be more of a "mother's helper" so that i could be involved with the boy's school still and take Liliana to any doctor's appointments, surgeries, etc. related to her heart or otherwise after she comes home. As we continued to explore the options and what might be right for us I was contacted out of the blue about hiring a Chinese Au Pair. We had considered this option years ago, but have since become much more financially conservative with our spending and thought that might not be something we wanted to put the money out for. 
After exploring the costs when compared to an American nanny we realized it really wasn't that much difference so that seemed like it could be an option then. The biggest difference lied in the fact that this girl would be living with us for 1-2 years. To be honest we really didn't have an extra bedroom so we thought that might not really work, but we didn't rule it out completely and instead continued to pray about it. If there is one thing I know for sure it is that even when we can not even imagine a way God can still make a way if it is His will.  for a couple of weeks we talked about it as a family, prayed about it and continued to look into all the pros and cons of an Au Pair.  

The most exciting part to us of course is the fact that we LOVED the idea that our Chinese speaking two year old would possibly be able to transition into our English world much easier if we had another Chinese speaking person in our home. Derek and I are also learning Mandarin and take classes weekly, but we are certainly not fluent. We know  just enough to get in trouble so what a better way to continue learning the language than to live with a native speaking Chinese person?!  And we are very adamant about keeping Lily's Chinese culture and heritage a part of her life and integrating it into our family, as well as, making sure she can continue to learn and speak Chinese as well as English. How could we better see to it that all of those things are done? We couldn't think of a better way. But we still had the problem of already having fit 6 people in 5 bedrooms and that was soon to be 7 people in 5 bedrooms...how could be add yet another person - an adult even - that would need there own bedroom?  It just wasn't here!

Ah, but God......one evening as we were putting the two youngest boys to bed (Max and Parker) Parker said, "Mom, I would really like it if Max moved back into a room with me again." Max overheard his brother saying this and came running in from his room and said, "yeah, mom, we have talked about it and I don't really need my own room. We are always together playing anyway and Parker has plenty of room in his closet for my clothes." Since we moved into our home last year the boys have had their own rooms but prior to that they had been sharing since Parker was about 2 years old. They had a bunk bed and they had always wanted to be together. Often since moving into this home Max would spend many nights sleeping in Parker's room or Parker would sleep in Max's.  Still I couldn't believe what I was hearing...they really wanted to share a room again?!  This would mean that we would have a "spare" bedroom again!  Even when we don't see a way........

So to make a very long story short; the boys moved into a room together and in the same afternoon I assembled a "spare room" that could be used for an Au Pair.  We then began to get pretty serious about looking into that service and began to email and interview (through Skype) Chinese college students and grads that were part of the Au Pair program and waiting to be matched with a family.  We decided as we started that we would give the process a chance but if the perfect scenario didn't present itself then we would go back to the drawing board. 

It was so surreal - still is!  How could we be thinking of adding 2 Chinese girls to our family now?!  After a couple of weeks of interviews and messages back and forth we knew we had found the right girl. All of the girls we spoke to were super sweet and all seemed like they would be great, but this girl was The One!  I immediately felt a "soul connection" with her. She would later tell us that she felt that same thing. She said she had been praying for the right family and had almost given up hope - even asking God why he had her waiting so long. She felt like maybe she had misunderstood what she was supposed to be doing and maybe this wasn't the right path for her life. That, she said, was the day before she got the email from us and then spoke to us that very evening through Skype.  Even when we did not know that we were going to hire an Au Pair God was preparing her for our family and our family for her :)  

Her English name is Morgan and she is a 22 year old sophomore in college studying as an English major. 

We will meet with her when we go to China to pick up Lily in August (even though we have already offered her the position and she is working on her VISA, paperwork, etc.). She is going to take the 6 hour bullet train ride to the province we will be just so she can meet us face to face and meet Lily.  After that she will go to more training in New York City in the beginning of September and move in with our family by mid-September.  Just a few weeks after we get home with Lily!  

We just feel so blessed to have been given this blessing of yet another Chinese daughter (she says she is excited to be a big sister - JieJie - to our children :) Even if she only lives with us for a year or two I know that we will make a connection with this beautiful girl that will last all of our families lives. As a family these are the things that we hold the most dear - relationships!  
I know that we may have to give up some "things" with the adoption of Liliana, but what we will gain is so infinitely more important and powerful. The same will hold true now for adding Morgan (our Au Pair) to the family, but I know that God has big blessings for both her and our family in store from this relationship and I am just so excited about it.  If God has called us to it He will walk us through it :)

I want to wrap up by switching gears a little and with a very deep sadness in my heart.....this world lost a very beautiful soul this past week, Crystal Kelley Young. She was my age (we went to school together) and her death came as a sudden shock to her loved ones. She passed away in her sleep.
My heart breaks for her family and for the loss of one of the best, kindest and sweetest people I have ever known.  She has been one of the biggest supporters of my family over the last 3 years when we first started the adoption process for China through our adoption of Gabby and most recently upon finding out about Lily. We have had so many touching and heartwarming conversations and I am heartbroken to know that I will not be able to speak with her when we bring Lily home. I do rejoice, though, knowing that she is no doubt in Heaven celebrating with the angels now as I know she loved the Lord with all her heart. 
God bless you, Crystal, and keep you until we meet again! 

Be blessed, 
Jessica 

Monday, July 14, 2014

Moments, Milestones and Memories!

This past week was full of great moments, milestones and memories!  Our Article 5 in China was picked up on July 2nd and now we wait for our travel approval. We had really hoped that last week would be the week we would get that, but it wasn't to be. I am praying that God was saving that incredible news for this week because how can you have so much good stuff in one week?!

So last week started with Derek and I going to the Federal Building downtown and the USCIS office to get our fingerprints updated.
 Derek filling out his paperwork.
Since they expire on August 10th we needed to be sure that we had them updated for when we do leave for China. That went flawlessly and we are anticipating getting our receipt back (the paperwork we need to take with us) quickly.

Montana (Tanner - our oldest son) got his passport in the mail so that was also very exciting!

We had an amazing week of VBS at Rivertree Church and I just kept thinking that next year's VBS I will have a beautiful China doll running around with her sister - double trouble!  :)

We had also started our interviews with Au Pairs from China. After much praying and searching for what childcare route we should go once Lily comes home we felt that God very clearly spoke this program into our hearts so we began to explore it.
With having the 2 two year old girls at home I knew I was going to need help to get through all the medical exams, doctor appts and numerous other things that may come up after bringing Liliana home. We felt the best way to handle it was to have a nanny or really just a "mother's helper" that could be there when I needed someone. Right now we enjoy our precious Mariah every week, but she will be going back to school about the same time we are coming home with Lily. (we had considered trying to clone her, though!)

After speaking with many incredible Chinese girls we have certainly felt we connected with one specifically. We continue to explore all the ins and outs and are asking God for continued clarity on the situation, but we hope to have an answer to if we will have TWO new girls in our family or not very soon.

And to save the best for last was Lily's Adoption Shower! My sweet girlfriends (a group of 5 or 6  or more of them!) hosted a party to celebrate Lily and her upcoming arrival to our family - her family this past Saturday at our church.  It was so incredibly beautiful. I was moved to tears (still am just thinking about it) as I walked in and saw the decorations and transformation that the room had made at these talented ladies hands - and 3 of them that were part of the active planning,
decorating and putting together of this party had brand new babies!! Man do I feel loved and know that my sweet little girl is completely accepted and loved by my incredible network of family and friends.  :)

It was so wonderful just to spend the afternoon thinking about, talking about and celebrating our precious little girl. I prayed that God would just wrap her in warmth in the moment and allow her to feel all of the love that was in that room for her wherever she was at that time.

We also took up a donation to be given to the orphanage that is currently caring for Liliana and I was amazed that there was more than $600 given to bless those precious children! I can hardly wait to pass that along to them.

I have included many pictures from the event below. I hope you enjoy and stay tuned for the announcement of our travel dates - we are believing to know those this week!!!



 Look at how incredibly beautiful and sweet these decorations are!  These ladies are incredibly talented aren't they?! :)

Look at all those babies! Ranging from 4 days old to 6 months old :)
Look at this table of incredible food - the cupcake tower were made my dear dear friend, Anna Limbird. She is a dessert genius! The basket on the very end had fortune cookies that had been dipped in white and milk chocolate with sprinkles and tied up in twos :) Inside instead of "fortunes" were scriptures.  Jennifer is another dear friend that has made yummy confection making her career...her talent shows here for sure with the fortune cookies! :)

My beautiful Chinese friend Liyuan (Grace) and her mother-in-law and my dear friend Elaine


My precious sister-in-laws Sarah (w/ my sweet brand new niece, Emily) and Ashlee and, of course, my baby girl Gabby!





 My girlfriend, Christie, made this donation box for the shower. Instead of gifts we asked that if guests wanted to give anything it be in the form of a donation (no matter how small) to Lily's orphanage. There are many other children that will remain behind and we want to provide whatever we can for them until they find their families :)

 My sweet mother-in-law :)

Our middle son, Maxwell, wanted to join the shower so he came along with me. He wore his "favorite shirt" (as he says!) and brought along the canvas print of his newest baby sister for the shower - love this kid!!! 

Thank you to everyone who made this shower such a special day for me, Lily and all the children that will be effected because of your love and generosity! We are all the hands and feet :)
Much love, 
Jessica & family